I am shivering from the cold. My naked body is drenched in cold sweat. Spring night in Jerusalem is not usually cold; however, tonight is not an ordinary night!

Jesus, our Lord, has been arrested.

He has been praying at the Garden of Gethsemane, and everything seems tranquil and peaceful. Several of our fellow companions are fast asleep next to him. Suddenly, a large group of soldiers arrive in great force, and it turns out that the leader is that guileful Judas. He comes up to give my Lord a kiss, and immediately two soldiers step forward and grab my Lord. Our sleeping fellow companions jump up, and someone raises a sword trying to protect our Lord and strikes out at a soldier. All the others dash out of the garden. I am at a loss and slow to react. A soldier grabs at the sackcloth I have on my body. Luckily, it falls down from my body as I run away ignoring the soldiers pointing at my bare back and laughing out loud. I manage to get away. If it is just ordinary clothing that I was wearing, it would mean that I would be caught. However, this is not why I only wear sackcloth!

I am so fascinated by Jesus that I cannot take my eyes off him and have to be with him day and night. His teachings strike straight into the depth of my heart beyond the grasp of my mind, my hopes and expectations. I stand and watch in awe at his miracles. But all these are not why I am attracted to him. I have been firmly grasped by him all because of his compelling charisma. Everything he says, every time he stretches out his hand to touch someone, there is an abundance of love and care. So I follow him everywhere, over mountains and seas, having walked hundreds of miles all over Galilee.

He once meets a young man, well-dressed and apparently from a rich family, who also wants to follow him. “Teacher, what must I do to inherit eternal life?” Jesus says, “Sell all your possessions and follow me.” Disheartened by the saying, he goes away feeling sorrowful. I am not rich. And this is an advantage. I have left everything to follow Jesus, everything. I have sold what can be sold; I have given away what can be given away, except a piece of sackcloth to cover my body and a rope to fasten it up with. It could be that I am still young and Jesus has not chosen me to be an apostle. Nevertheless, I am no less devoted and faithful to him than the apostles.

Tonight Jesus is arrested at Gethsemane. Many of our fellow companions flee; so do I, panicked and do not know what to do. No one wants to be caught by the soldiers.

I panic and flee. As the soldier grabs the sackcloth on my body, it falls off. That is how I manage to get away naked.

I thought I have given up everything to follow Jesus, everything, except a piece of sackcloth. Tonight, that piece of sackcloth is gone too, and I become the laughingstock. At the same time, I am also ashamed of myself. Instead of sticking with Jesus and laying down my life for him, I desert him, naked.

What Jesus has said about leaving everything to follow him not only includes this piece of sackcloth but also my dignity. And my self-praise and pride as well. It is then that I have absolutely nothing.

As the legend goes, if this young man is St. Mark, his surrender does not stop here. He eventually renounces his life for Jesus as a martyr on the street of Alexandria. Luke 14:33 “Teacher, what must I do to inherit eternal life?” Jesus says,
“Sell all your possessions and follow me.”
“So therefore, none of you can become my disciple if you do not give up all your possessions.”

Tao Te Ching 48: Tao Te Ching 48:： Pursue Tao,
and you will become increasingly humble.
Keep humbling yourself,
And you will reach the state of being free.